


Calculated

by steelneena



Series: CR 2 Oneshots and Short Series [5]
Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Gen, This is all Liam's fault
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-29
Updated: 2018-12-29
Packaged: 2019-09-29 16:07:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 566
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17206583
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/steelneena/pseuds/steelneena
Summary: They're simply not serving his purpose anymore. Not even close.





	Calculated

**Author's Note:**

> You can thank Liam for this. He keeps freaking saying on Talks that if Caleb doesn't feel like the group is serving his purpose, Caleb will disappear and he'll roll a new character
> 
> And I haven't been able to get the scenario out of my head

 

The bickering, in the end, did nothing. They were docked for one more evening, to square with the local vendors, rest up, and make sure that everything was going to be alright. And then they were heading back out. It frustrated Caleb to no end. It was apparent that he was _far_ from the only one who wanted desperately to be back on land, to move forward, to let the sleeping leviathans slumber for a millennia longer. And yet, no one had spoken up firmly enough to sway Fjord.

Not that Caleb was the exception by any means. He’d waited to see if anyone else would take their stand. Weary as they were of the ocean, he had been certain that someone was going to speak up. Perhaps Caduceus, whom he could sense growing more and more wary of Fjord’s burgeoning powers and their patron, or Nott, who despised the water more and more with each passing day (but then, she would never speak up if he did not…). Maybe Yasha, who apparently had somewhere to be. Not Jester. And not Beau.They’d all simply gone along with it, against better judgement, perhaps.

It left Caleb in a predicament. They simply weren’t serving his purpose anymore. Not even in a roundabout manner. Not even close

_Wake Nott._

That was what his heart was telling him, that sentimental beast.

_Don’t wake Nott._

That was what his mind was hissing in whisper. Pushing, calculating.

Caleb weighed the pros and cons.

He’d already established himself amongst the Nein. They understood one another well, fought together well. He’d put extensive time and effort into deal making with the exceptionally powerful and promising of their number. He would have to start from scratch, and he would be alone in the interim. Besides, two of them were aware of him and his background in greater detail than most anyone still living.

But…he would leave behind the growing notoriety of their name (he recalled Fjord telling Twiggy to tell of them to everyone she met). He would no longer have to consider the fact that Ikithon had a very basic acquaintance with both Beau and Yasha. He would not have to suffer Fjord’s ill-fated desire to find the last eye. If he did start over, he could be more careful. And the attachments his disgusting heart had formed among the Nein would be severed for the better.

Pointedly, he did _not_ think of Jester’s face. Or Nott’s. Or of the unknowing promises that Caduceus had already made him.

It was for the better. It would always be for the better. He had a mission, a purpose, and Caleb was tired of running in the opposite direction. He felt stagnant as the Mystake in the doldrums. With anxious energy, Caleb itched for the land beneath his feet.

It had been a good run. All things, however, came to an end. This was but one thing in a long line of things that had ended in Caleb’s time. And there would yet be more. Really. It was for the better, after all. And if the Dodecahedron and the Happy Fun Ball of Tricks were missing, it wasn’t as though the Nein would notice right away.

When Nott woke that morning, it was as if Caleb had never even been a member of the Nein, ghosted away in the night. Just how he wanted it.


End file.
